Reading this aloud will tie you in knots!
“A monumental muck up!” moaned Maurice to Malcolm after measuring the mechanic’s maximum margins on markdowns on Mazda manifolds. Maurice and Malcolm were managing partners of Matthew’s Motors, located on Moonwalk Boulevard next door to Mason’s Microbrewery. Maurice wore a monocle to minimize the macular degeneration of his membranes that were mediocre at best. The muck up that Maurice mentioned to Malcolm, his mustachioed partner, had been motivated by the malfunctioning manifolds manufactured in Michigan; that misdiagnosed the multi-processors, and muted the million plus microwaves in the warehouse. The major recall of a million Mazda’s would mean a mind blowing moratorium on sales. Matthew’s Motor’s monopoly on motor scooters and motorboats would momentarily be mothballed, while Maurice and Malcolm mounted a masterful method of maneuvers which were designed to motivate middle management into a makeshift mindset, in order to organize a meeting.
The M and M boys inserted a mole into the group of medicated mediators who met at the Masonic Hall to motivate, merge, and maneuver the Methodists and their merrymaking mentors into a militant majority of Mazda misfits. Malcolm’s main squeeze, Muffy from Minnesota, tried to mollify the malcontents by menu planning. She muzzled the mythmakers by serving mounds of muskrat, mango, and matzoh balls with mustard on the side. An all-girl orchestra, Minerva and the Milkmaids, arrived in a minibus, and offered a mixture of Mozart and Mendelsohn, music that when played at 78 RPM’s, would cause a meltdown in the mercury materials used in the Mazda manifolds. Muffy used her MasterCard.
The mainstream media, The Minnesota Muckraker, a militant mind-numbing weekly; marshalled its masters of the misconstrued in an attempt to minimize the makeover/takeover move by their rival paper. Smoke and Mirrors, which was a midmorning publication, was a midweekly bimonthly paper that misspelled most of its misguided mission statements, and its management mistakes were mixed in with its misunderstandings. Both papers ran only one comic strip; Mandrake the Magician. Smoke and Mirrors had one newsman, a retired macaroni maker, whose moniker, Macho Mondale, had motivated a massive multitude of readers. Their largest ad account was Mini Cooper Motors, whose lines included the Macro and the Mighty; the Mighty featured six doors and no trunk space. Sales of Cooper cars had dropped dramatically, so when their matchless mufflers malfunctioned during Mardi Gras, Cooper’s millionaire owners mumbled about makeshift metals melting during the membership mergers.
Maurice and Malcolm were rivals for the hand of the magnificent Muffy; both men had mounted a major megawatt effort to win her heart. Malcolm made many mistakes in melting Muffy’s heart; he had used moldy mistletoe and played mind-numbing music which resulted in a melodramatic mishmash of pure monotony. Maurice responded with his menu madness method i.e. Melmac plates with mounds of mozzarella, masses of marmalades, a fine Merlot, plus a marching mariachi band. Dessert was mandarin orange meringue pie. Malcolm muscled in with a mouthwatering meatloaf, plus a murky Muscatel, and finally a macadamia marble cake that was served by manicured Mambo instructors. Muffy reveled in the maniacal manhood measures being utilized by Maurice and Malcolm. The men employed matadors plucking mandolins, and male models at the mall making mittens just for Muffy. Even the Mafia provided a massacre of mobsters as a show of mutual admiration.
Muffy, tired of all the attention, chose Mickey McMurphy for her mate, and drove with him in her Mercury to the mall, where the movie marquee featured “Malcolm in the Middle”, plus “Madonna Microwaves Mutton”.
Would you agree with me that Achilles was a heel?
A show of hands please.