G is for Goofin’ Around

Read aloud to enhance the pleasure and effect.

An alliteration is when you use words that have the same sound at the beginning i.e. bridge over a babbling brook; then the fun starts!!

George gulped down his gumbo, while awaiting the gut busting Gulf Coast grilled filet of gecko coming off the grill. Gino, the owner of the Garlic Grill, sold gecko by the gunnysack in the gift shop next door. Gino’s staff were gorgeous geishas, gussied up in gabardine gaucho pants. They seated their guests at tables with goblets of gin. Many customers would order grilled gecko to go, with sides of gingerbread and ginseng tea. The Grill was a gathering place for the gals to get together to giggle and gossip, in the guise of grouping up to discuss the need for more geraniums. They wore gingham and chewed gum drops, while German gents offered gelatins, hoping to garner the girl’s attention.

George’s girlfriend Greta, founder of the Gestalt Generation, was making gestures to the guards with guns, to gently round up the gingham guests for relocation. The town of Godwits Gulch; the birthplace of “Gulches Fried Gecko”, was having a generation celebration; it was 20 years old! Greta; Godwits Gulch’s genuine goddess, was the gifted genius who had gallantly goaded the City Council to cast a goldeneye on the project.

A group of Georgia golfers, sporting goatees, were geared up in garments of gray and gunmetal green.They were selling gobs of galoshes to governmentalists who had the gonads to study geysers. At the Garlic Grill, gourmet chefs presented gigantic gurneys of guacamole to accompany the gallons of gumbo with garbanzo beans. Gino’s goal at the Garlic Grill was to gentrify the generations of giraffe guardians into gay and gallant geophysicists.

“Gosh”, said George to Greta “your generosity with greenbacks means we can get out of Godwits Gulch, and go to Green Bay, or the Great Lakes”. Using a gyroscope, they set out with their pet, Gladys, a gentle gerbil that gargled with grape juice to prevent gingivitis. Greta glanced at George, and gesturing with her gloved hand toward a group of golden geraniums said “Gee, George. There’s a gopher in the glen!” George gathered a group of guards with guns for gopher protection, while he and Gladys made their getaway on a Greyhound bus. The guy driving the Greyhound, failed to guesstimate the guidelines on the road, and struck a guardrail. Greta and George, inhaled some greenhouse gases, but continued on their journey.

Meanwhile, Godwits Gulch was having a film gala, with golden oldie stars like Greta Garbo and Clark Gable. A special screening of “Getting Gerties Garter”, was showing at the old Gramercy theater (the one with the gargoyles) on Golgotha Street. Greta and George, after consulting with their guru, gathered their germ-free gear, gulped down a gin fizz, and entered the theater. Greta gushed with glee at the guitarist in the lobby, and grunted to George, “Golly, my gums are sore from chewing Good and Plenty, but that guitar makes me grin.”

A Garage Band, named Genghis Khan and the Generals, had been found guilty of guzzling Gilbeys Gin during intermission. Guidelines from the guidebook guaranteed that guitarists couldn’t guzzle; their goose was cooked. Genghis gently replied that the gin wasn’t germane to guilt.

Sheriff Buford T. Justice shouted, “The goddamn Germans got nothing to do with it”!             [ref. movie, “Smokey and the Bandit.”]