Banging large limbs on a hollow log and blowing smoke signals were the very earliest ways of keeping in touch with one’s fellow man. Powerful grunting, accompanied by pushing and shoving became useful in attempting to prove one’s point. Fast forward from chiseling on stone tablets to emailing on an iPad, we find that communication skills (the concept of talking one on one) still needs a little fine tuning. Edison’s wonderful invention that snatched away the sounds of silence hovering over our nation in the early 20th century is fast becoming an in dangered species.
“I hate talking on the phone!” seems to be the hue and cry of a population that seeks to avoid conversation with another human. Instead of hello, the caller might hear “I can only talk for a minute!”, or “Can I call you back?” These responses at the outset thereby eliminate any desire the caller may have had to share some good news, offer to take them to dinner, or tell her that you’re in love with her husband. I have found myself in the position of scripting my phone calls in advance; health, sports, politics, cars or restaurants are a few of my mainstays. If the first two or three topics receive yes or no responses, I know it’s time to hang up and refresh my game of solitaire.
We must step back in history more than 50 years to rediscover the fact that music and lyrics had the power to move and motivate us. I can recommend a few: for new dads “ Soliloquy from the musical Carousel”; the sadness of a broken heart, listen to “Stranger on the Shore by Aker Bilk”; the most intimate love song “The First Time ever I saw your Face” sung by Roberta Flack.”, And finally a visual and audio treat that will stir your soul; on the Internet type in “flash mob, Ode to Joy.” I’ll wait while you research and listen to these selections just to make sure we’re on the same page! Please cooperate in this exercise; I guarantee the rewards will be beneficial.
Welcome back! When was the last time you paused on life’s merry-go-round to take an emotional holiday? What you just experienced became available because I wanted to share with you the personal thrill of defining certain special moments that literally moved my soul! Modern-day music ;( can we call it music?) And lyrics (now you know I’m really joking!) simply fall by the wayside in comparison. Special musical moments between a love struck couple might go like this: “Hey baby, I really dug that part where the lead singer smashed his guitar on the drummers head!” Her response “Yeah, but the turkey plucking by the base player scored big on my personal charts!” There, I’ve granted you an inside peek of the musical appreciation of Beatrice and Butthead. I rest my case.
The future of fine dining will further diminish any pre-dinner small talk i.e. old-fashioned conversation. Who needs it? A drop-down menu board will permit each diner to text the chef about their particular choice of entrées for dinner. (No substitutions!) After the orders have been placed, everyone in the main dining room is invited to play Jeopardy on the big screen TV! The answers are submitted by pushing a table side button, and if you’re correct you’ll receive just enough money to pay the tip. Just imagine the minutia of trivia that is eliminated by this automated dining experience!
Let’s stamp out gabbing over the back fence; juicy gossip at the hairdressers, and talking about sports in a bar. Once these distractions are eliminated we can just sit home and watch TV (volume down, closed captioning activated.) In no time at all, conversation has been reduced to click, beep, and dot. Sounds of silence again. For God’s sake, can someone get Watson a tissue?!