An Alliteration to be Read Aloud to Enhance the Pleasure
It was paramount to Pedro and Pablo that prepaid passes for the performance would be packaged with the parking permits. Pacifists were picketing the Palladium on pack horses that prohibited the public from picking their way toward the pinochle tables adjacent to the piano platforms. Pedro and Pablo, two parolees, had parlayed a career of pantomime and Piccolo tuning, into a powerhouse of popular entertainment. Wearing paisley pajamas as their trademark, the pair promoted the principals of Parcheesi and pizza, while publicizing their puppet shows, and every event began with a parade.
Prize-winning poodles with pedigrees paraded down Piedmont Street, as painted pinto ponies paced themselves behind the pooches. A dozen pinups wearing pink pinafores and smoking peace pipes marched behind. A pod of poets performed soliloquies and sonnets, while administering polygraphs to the pickpockets who had been caught by the postmaster. Paper boys reading paperbacks penetrated the parade by pushing pandas on pushcarts toward the patrolmen, who permitted them to join the march. Pallets piled high with pimentos were placed on a float decorated by a party of paper hangers wearing pantaloons dyed in shades of puce and purple, the official colors of the People’s Populist Politburo.
Pedro’s girlfriend Patricia, patrolled the pavement, strewing pansies in the path of the paralegals and the Planned Parenthood participants, who were pushing their pasteboard posters in front of the prize poodles. Patricia paused in her pansy strewing pursuit to provoke the intruders. She performed pantomime gestures so intricate that they postponed their plot to push aside the poodles in favor of guessing what the pantomime gestures meant. Pedro praised Patricia’s plucky plan and placed a partly thawed plate of potato salad mixed with parsnips within her reach. Patricia, pulsating with pulchritude, responded to the food by pledging her future paychecks to print pamphlets promoting performances by the Pixies, as a promise to Pedro and Pablo.
The parade petered out near the Plaza; allowing the poodles to pee, and the pinto ponies to prance, while the poets and the pinups made a point of poking fun at the pompous plutocrats parked by the post office. Meanwhile, at the Palladium, pre-performance jitters proliferated among the panicked performers, as they peeked through the curtains to watch the potbellied potentates arrive. The evening’s presider took his place at the podium to pronounce to the audience the pace of the proceedings about to be presented. First up: 12 pretty paramilitary, parasol waving princesses, participating in a pancake pageant featuring pastries and pastas from the post waffle period. Second act: pigs with pigtails pirouetting in pastel pantsuits, playing piccolos and poking piñatas with polished pointed prongs. A powerhouse performance!
The finale featured Pedro and Pablo at the twin pianos playing popular post-classical pieces portraying passion and pathos, as the principal partners participating in this spellbinding piano purification of Paganini. The pixies had prevailed!! The city of Portland praised their performance and promised future public patronage from Portland’s populace! A new group, Percy and the Paperweights, would parachute down from 5000 feet, while playing their percussion instruments, and landing in a pasture near the Pavilion. The pixies would pamper Percy’s pack with payola, parking privileges, and pizza; thus ensuring an appearance without peer from Percy.
Pedro and Pablo paused to ingest tablets of Percocet. Their paternal cousin, Penelope, promised the guys pecan pudding as a prize!